Saturday, November 8, 2014

Coaching 7th Grade Girls


Yes, you read that right. I coached girls' 7th grade volleyball this Fall. Why? Well it just kind of happened. Coaching has always been in the back of my mind to want to try to fit into my working schedule some day. Maybe after my kids were all in school and could hang out at practices and games and sitters wouldn't be an issue. But I kept having kids. More and more. And the infancy and toddler stage was an ever-constant time in our home.


Last April I was approached and gave it some positive thought. Then that opportunity was gone as the coaching position was filled. Then in July, the opportunity came open again and I knew that July was a late month to hire someone from outside of the district. I love the school where I work, and I love girls' athletics in general. So with little thought, I took the position.Whoa.

I was worried anxious terrified of coaching of the girls. 12 year olds are fragile and scary. Especially girls. I was one once. And I've been around young BOYS for the past 10 years. It was unfamiliar to me and uncomfortable. Plus, I hadn't played competitive volleyball since 1997, the Fall of my Senior year in high school. I was an All-District setter and was confident back then..... but oh man, I was for sure questioning my expertise almost 20 years later.

So yes, not just a 7th grade sport, but the FIRST school sport for these girls to ever play. The 12 year old preteens; brand new to big junior high, sports teams and organizations, class changes, dances, and the new freedom of being out of grade school. Also new to hormones. I'm re-scaring myself just typing this.

Very fortunate for me I worked the two weeks of high school 2-a-days in August and was able to refresh my memory on drills and fundamentals. Plus I got used to being around all girls...the squeals, emotional ups and quickly downs, the outspokenness and confidence (and lack of)... so many reminders came flooding back to me. I am so thankful to have had those two weeks to prepare.

The first day of school for the junior high teams was just introducing the girls to athletics period and issuing workout clothes, laundry buckles, lockers and locks. Day 2 included 'How to Bump.' Day 3 included a letter sent to parents on after-school practices and when to pick up their child. Day 3 included 'How to Serve.' Day 4 was 'How to Properly Hang Your Dirty Laundry On Your Buckle and Put in Laundry Bucket.'

Week 2 was prepping for our first tournament. Yes, we had a tourney BEFORE a single game.
That first tourney was about an hour away. I explained to them we would be leaving early that Saturday morning. One athlete asked, 'What time do we need to be there?'
I explained we would be leaving from the school together on a bus.
'We get to ride on a bus?! COOL!' (7th grade remember?).

At the tourney my very inexperienced team lost their first game. It was mostly my fault. I hadn't taught them the proper way to run around the court before the game and handshake the opposing team. I hadn't taught them enough of how to sub in and out. My BIGGEST mistake and embarrassment was that I had been telling my team to rotate the wrong way the entire two weeks we had been practicing. Seriously? Yes.
So that first time they rotated, the referee paused the game, checked our lineup then told me they were backwards. I told them to rotate the other way and they all looked at me like 'This isn't right.'  I told them it was right and to just do what the ref said. Also my team didn't know to wait for the ref's signal before serving and they didn't know that the game went to 25 points. I had been so busy with teaching them to bump and serve and to properly put their laundry on their buckles, I had forgotten these important elements of the game....
After the first match we lost, but not by much. The early part of the 7th grade season is more about who can serve the best. Not many teams can volley, bump, set, or spike so it's serving back and forth until someone reaches 25 first. When the ref blew the whistle to end the first match my team had no idea what was going on. I told them 'That's it, it's over.... come over here.' They ran over to me at the bench..... but of course I had forgotten the volleyball-etiquette of running to the back of the court then around to the other court side bench. It's been 20 years remember? The incredibly patient ref had to inform me and them to go to back of the court then switch benches. I apologized to the officials multiple times that day.

In between matches as other coaches are telling their team strategies to win and areas to improve, my girls were asking when they play again, was the game over and do they play another time that day. I told them it was best 2 out of 3. 'So we play again? Another game?,' one asked.
'No we play another match,' I said. 'If we win then we play a third match to see who wins the game.'
'Do we play again today?' I was asked again. Then the ref's whistle blew and it was time to take the court. No strategy.
That match we lost too, but barely. We finally got down the rotation thing, the subbing thing (not gonna lie, it took weeks to get the subbing thing down completely), how to serve BEHIND the line and how a match ended.
We played two more games that day and won convincingly. I left the tourney positive and hopeful. And the girls had fun.
 
The following Monday was our first regular season game. The girls who hadn't gone to the tourney were excited to play and I had learned a lot from the weekend before so I felt more ready to coach them. As I issued uniforms to the new players the afternoon of the game I heard them telling each other, 'This is so cool!' It was a home game and I was a little nervous. My team was too .
As the first game got started, I had already told them how to start the game with the handshake and how to wait for the signal to serve. We had practiced earlier in the day on the correct way to rotate..... amidst the girls making comments like, 'Is this how we've been doing it?' and 'Is this right?' I just nodded and said 'Yes this way, good job.'
As my second team took the floor for the very first time and the whistle was blown for the first serve I heard a girl on the bench behind me say, 'This is the best day of my life.' I just smiled. The best day of her life to this point in her 12 years was right then. Sitting on the bench at the beginning of the B game in 7th grade volleyball. I was so excited for her.
The B games had a 30 minute time limit which was good because usually each team had won a match and had started the third match when the time was over.... everyone got a win. They also got good playing time each week and learned valuable lessons that only they could experience in a real game.

Our first A Team game at home, I'll admit I was a sweaty, hot, nervous mess. We won... by way of making a lot of serves. Still early in the season. We were still learning on subbing in and out, serve/ receive and net positions, rotating and when the game was over.

I don't think I ever had a team huddle where I was able to do all the talking. Every 12 year old girl has her opinion and idea of how to fix something.... a volleyball game-plan is no different. 'I'm the coach,' I'd tell them. 'I only have 55 seconds to talk to you so everyone stop talking and listen to me.'

We were 1-0. The girls were excited and everyone ended the first night on a good note.
The next two months were a whirlwind of repetitions; practice, questions, lost laundry, more questions, more lost laundry, more practice and games. I've tried to make mental notes of the funny things I heard or was questioned during the season. Here they are in no order of importance or humor:

Daily: 'I can't find my shorts or shirt and I KNOW I put them on my buckle and in the bucket.'
          'Can I call my (mom) and tell her we have practice?'
          'When will you tell us what team we're on?'
          'I don't have any shoes (or socks, or hair band).'

A lot of times:
          'We get to ride on a school bus?'
          'Is the game over?'
          'Did we win?'
          'I can't hit it twice?'
          'Can I stick my hand through the net?'
          'Running makes it hard to breathe.'
          'Why do all the coaches keep saying they want us in shape?'
          'Can we go into the exercise room?' (weight room)
          'My (insert body part) hurts.'

All of the girls developed and matured into volleyball players during the course of the two months. I couldn't be prouder. They made me laugh every day. They never remembered to take off their jewelry so I had clumps of earrings and bracelets in my pockets at every game. They also made me want to pull my hair out on a daily basis as well. The amount of estrogen and added emotion circulating through that locker room could take down Super Man faster than kryptonite. On top of that, I was dealing with athletes, several of who had aggressive personalities. Loud is the only word I can come up with in describing what it was like. (And this is coming from a mom with four kids... and three boys). Being a mom, helped me be a coach. And coaching them, also helped prepped me for having teens of my own.

By the end of the season, my first-timers, melodramatic, hormonal package of volleyball players was sitting in 2nd place going into the District tournament with a 5-1 record. I knew they could actually win it. I knew they had the stubbornness strong will determination to beat everyone. The one game we had lost came after an hour long drive and first trip on the 'school bus.' We didn't play how we usually did and I knew we could do better.

Our first game at the tournament was our toughest that day. We won in three very tight matches, but we were in the winner's bracket, which was our goal to begin with. Our next game I knew we could win. We did just that in two matches, but I was not happy with the team's effort or attitudes. When they came off the court I told them 'Well, you're playing in the District Championship, but do I look happy?' (I didn't.)
'Why aren't you glad we won?,' they asked.
I explained to them that even though they had won, they didn't play how I knew they could. They didn't hustle. They didn't stay positive with each other and I still had too many coaches on the court. They were griping and mouthing at each other and I could tell there was some off-the-court drama causing this. This was their chance to learn how to focus and forget about outside issues and play as a team. They knew they hadn't played well or together. I asked them to figure out before the next game how they were going to end this season..... when I said that, a load of questions came firing back.

'What do you mean, END it?' they started in. 'Volleyball's over after today?'  
Bless it. They had no clue what position they were in. How important today was or how well they had played against everyone else in their district. I never told them that I had another team's coach come up to me during the day asking our record and commenting on how well they played fundamentally and as a team. They had no clue how good they had become.
Ignorance is bliss... and apparently in 7th grade athletics, that's also how you beat everyone you play.
I informed them of their position and that yes on Monday basketball season would start. Their eyes grew wide. Then I heard whines. 'I don't want it to ennnnddddd.'
After pulling them back (once again) to the present situation, I told them to get a drink, sit as a team in the stands and think about what they needed to do for their last game.

In the first match of the championship game they did not play well in any way of the word. As their coach, I had to stand there and watch them crumble. They didn't call the ball, they missed serves, they froze when a ball came their way.... it was not their level of play at all and I knew they were devastated in a 12 year old girl kind of way. Would they be able to claw their way back? Passed the point of not knowing when a match ended, my girls knew exactly when the other team had scored that winning point of the match. They walked to the back of the court and jogged around to the other side's bench. When I met them over there, I could see the defeat in their faces. They looked lost, tired and sad. But that didn't keep them from ALL talking at once. 'My thigh is burning where I fell, Coach Jackson, my wrist hurts, my knee hurts really bad....Does this mean we have to play them two more times?'
I asked the girls in pain if they were ready to take a rest on the bench and if they were done. They all shook their head no. Then I told them all to give each other and to give me another 30 minutes tops of hard work on the court, hustle and determination that they had shown all season; just 30 more minutes. They were behind and had to come back. They started to perk up and we briefly talked about their mistakes in the first match. They knew them all and the talk was short. I told them to jump out ahead early since we started out serving.
But in a matter of minutes we were already down 6-0. From the outside this didn't look promising, but I knew we were still a few points from being out of the game. I knew if we got the momentum we could keep it. I called timeout (which I rarely did). I yelled at the girls to run to the huddle. I told them this was the volley that they had to win and take control. I reminded them that we had come from behind by 9 points before and we could still do it now but we had to on this volley.
I still can't explain what happened next or how these emotionally driven, preteen girls girls pulled it off, but we won the next volley and kept the ball until we were ahead 9-6. We started playing how we knew we could play and the girls' focus never waivered again until we had won the 2nd match by 10 points, and then easily sailed through the 3rd match for the district title. For the FIRST time in our 2 month long season, the girls knew exactly when the winning point was over and I didn't have to tell them You won, come off the court. No, this time, when the last volley was tipped over the net and landed on the floor on the other side of the net, the girls knew right then they had won. And then the 12 year old girls came right back. They squealed. They jumped up and down like kangaroos. They hugged and double high-fived. And I did all of these things too.

I already knew they were the best team there. But to witness them overcome soreness, fatigue, girl drama and lack of focus to fight back in the middle of a match... they surely beat more than just their opponents.

On the way home that day on the school bus I listened as those crazy preteen girls yelled out the windows to every pedestrian or driver with their window down, 'We got ONE!'  Over and over. All. The. Way. Home.

Back at the school later that week as one of my tallest players turned in her uniform and knee pads, she told me she wasn't going to play basketball. 'Why in the world not?' I asked.
'I'm not very good at basketball,' she said.
'Well, two months ago you didn't even know anything about volleyball and look how you turned out.'
'That's right,' she said. 'I'm good.'

As a mom, I'm always up for challenges and new experiences. I guess that is how I talked myself into this little endeavor. Thankfully it didn't take much more time away from my kids at home. It also gave me a glimpse into what I'll have with my own daughter in 10 or so years; which is both frightening and exciting.












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